No…it’s not sex
What are the two taboo topics that should not to be discussed when dating someone new? Religion and politics. Why should it be considered “forbidden” to discuss these subjects during the first few dates?
Most people are very “set on” their religious and political beliefs. So it seems unwise not to find out what a potential partner’s beliefs are on these very important issues. Why waste time dating someone that you are not compatible with on matters that are so polarized? Why not find out before or during the first few dates if your ideals and values match up?
Most dating sites have both religion and politics as focused areas on their dating “profiles” so you can determine if you want to select that person to date. While scrolling profiles you can see where someone’s beliefs lie whether it is liberal, moderate, green party, conservative, atheist, agnostic, Jewish, Christian, etc.
Many people consider religious views before even dating someone. For example, a devout Christian might find it very difficult to be an atheist. Religion can be a deal breaker. Large gaps in beliefs may create conflict. Some religions won’t even consider blending for marriage. Wherever your beliefs lie, it is the conviction and strength behind them that will ultimately affect your outcome.
This also applies to politics. Some people will not consider being a relationship with someone who doesn’t share their political values or agenda. What is the most media covered topic? Politics. Introduce your right-winged great-grandpa who served in WWII to your bleeding-heart-liberal-feminist best friend and watch the sparks fly! Depending on individual beliefs and roots, politics can be a dividing line like the North and South in Gone with the Wind.
The stigma should be removed when dating in addressing both religion and politics, as overall compatibility is the foundation to a solid and long lasting relationship,
Discussing religion and politics at parties should still remain “off the table” topics in order to avoid offending or upsetting others with varying viewpoints.
However, your dating and relationship life is not a dinner party, so if your religious and political beliefs are unwavering, discussing these values upfront will give you the opportunity to make informed decisions for your future.
Leah Kay Rossi (copyright 2021)