Relationships and love


Don’t set your partner up to fail

Photo by Andres Ayrton on

Do you express clear expectations in your relationship? How do you express your expectations?

At times you or your partner may have the ever-elusive, unknown expectations. This is where you just assume your partner knows what you want without clear communication.

Making expectation assumptions can lead to a lot of misunderstandings and hurts.

You and/or your partner have to “know” the expectation before you can try to fulfill it.

Unless you are;

a.) lucky as a Leprechaun

b.) a mind reader

c.) so completely in sync with your lover you always meet all their expectations (you make me sick! Just kidding)

For Example:

He asks, “What do you want for your birthday?”

She says, “Oh, nothing really. I don’t really need anything, just save your money.”

What this unspoken expectation really means is:

Buy her something she wants, and you should already know what it is, if you had been listening to her.

Talking about what you want in a way your partner will “hear” you is key. Not by complaining or shaming them with guilt. Ask with a tone and words that are respectful and kind, the way you would want to be asked.

When an expectation has been unmet, mature communication can clear the future roads. Just like teaching or parenting, if the child doesn’t know what the expectations are, how are they supposed to meet them?

Don’t set your partner up to fail. Be mature, open and talk to your partner with positives and explain what your needs are and why. Once reasonable expectations are clear, they should be easy to meet. Don’t we all want to please the person we love the most?